Who Has 'the Smallest Penis in the World' and Who Has '10 Inches?' Celeb Guys Get Real About Their, Ahem, Junk
After Derulo’s steamy viral photo was taken down by Instagram, the “Talk Dirty” singer pointed out that he didn’t feel the shirtless post — which featured him in a rather, er, informative pair of briefs — had broken any community guidelines.
Protesting the removal, the singer re-shared the deleted photo alongside a snapshot of the notice he received from the social media platform, which dinged it for “nudity or sexual activity.”
He captioned the new post: “F-k u mean? I have underwear on… I can’t help my size..” and then (lest you were confused) clarified even further by commenting #bringbackanaconda.
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So, he may not have talked about his penis himself, but the Saturday Night Live star’s former fiancée, Ariana Grande, was more than willing to let her fans in on a secret in a since-deleted tweet. The “Side to Side” singer gave a very revealing answer when asked by a fan “how long Pete is.” While the fan quickly clarified they meant to ask how long Grande’s Sweetener interlude dedicated to Davidson is, Grande couldn’t resist including a bit of a wink-wink, nudge-nudge aside in her response. “Like 10 inches? …oh f—…i mean…like a lil over a minute,” she wrote.
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At a 2011 show, the Spain-born singer took a moment to discuss his private parts … as one does when they’re headlining a tour, of course. “What does Spanish good looks have to do with the size of your penis?” he asked his fans. “Maybe I have the Spanish looks, but I have the smallest penis in the world. I’m serious.”
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In an interview with the New York Times, the Harry Potter actor revealed that he had to give himself a pep talk while performing in the play Equus, in which he got naked for a full-frontal scene. “You tighten up like a hamster,” he said, blaming stage fright. “The first time it happened, I turned around and went, ‘You know, there’s a thousand people here, and I don’t think even one of them would expect you to look your best in this situation.’ I am terribly self-conscious.”
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Remember that time the “Sorry” singer was caught sans clothing, which led to a cringe-worthy “proud” comment from his dad? Yeah, that picture. Bieber spoke to Access Hollywood about it, sharing that what was on display is “as big as she gets.”
“I was scared. I first saw the one with the black bar over it,” he said. “I was like, ‘Oh my God. I just got out of the water. Shrinkage is real.’ No, no. That’s as big as she gets.”
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He may have starred in Alexander, but fans didn’t get the full experience when it was revealed the Irish actor’s nude scene in the film was cut. When asked about the move, Farrell merely said the scene would have been too much to handle for moviegoers — and from what he told Entertainment Weekly, we aren’t questioning the omission.
“I know the reason that it was cut out was that it just wasn’t right,” Farrell said. “If anything, it’s a beautiful, gentle moment — and a f—ing large c— with huge balls, is just f—ing jarring.”
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Theroux had a really big problem he was told to, umm, contain ahead of filming a jogging scene for The Leftovers. “When I went to get my wardrobe for the second jogging scene way later, there was my jogging pants and there was two pairs of underwear in the dressing room,” Theroux recounted on Conan. “And [the staff] were like, ‘They want you to wear them both.’ “
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Leave it up to Momoa’s Game of Thrones co-star and onscreen love interest, Emilia Clarke, to wax poetic about his package. “I saw his member, but it was covered in a pink fluffy sock,” Clarke told Glamour, while revealing the reason why Momoa didn’t film a nude scene on the HBO show. “Showing it would make people feel bad. It’s too fabulous.”
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While the critically acclaimed actor has stayed mum on the subject, his Prometheus co-star, Charlize Theron, not-so-subtly shared her thoughts on Fassbender (and his nude scene in Shame) when accepting her Ally for Equality Award, presented to her by the actor, at the 2012 Human Rights Campaign Gala. “Your penis was a revelation. I’m available to work with it anytime,” Theron said as the audience erupted in laughter. “I have to say that I was truly impressed that you chose to play it big. Most other actors would have gone small, trust me. No, I know because I have worked with them.”
And she wasn’t alone in praising Fassbender’s, err, asset — George Clooney had similar things to say. “Really Michael, honestly, you can play golf like this with your hands behind your back,” Clooney said, addressing Fassbender at the 2012 Golden Globes.
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Mayer didn’t hold back when (strangely) describing his penis, going as far as calling it Dominican — and offending Latinos everywhere in the process. “I’m not worried about how small my penis is — I’m worried about how dark it is,” he told Rolling Stone. “I have a Dominican penis. My penis hit six home runs last year; my penis wears shoes without socks.”
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Patricia Clarkson starred alongside Timberlake in the 2011 romantic comedy Friends with Benefits — where she caught a glimpse of the “SexyBack” singer’s sexy front. “Yeah… I had the good fortune to get to see him… all there,” Clarkson said on Watch What Happens Live, claiming that Timberlake was “big.”
“They were shooting a scene that he couldn’t keep anything on,” she explained. “And he is a… gorgeous man.”
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Bachelor star Courtney Robertson revealed she and the Entourage actor hooked up, sharing intimate details of Grenier’s physique in her tell-all, I Didn’t Come Here to Make Friends. Grenier addressed the claims, mostly about his package, during an appearance on Watch What Happens Live. “She said you had the biggest dick she’s ever seen,” host Andy Cohen recalled.
The actor seemed flattered, responding: “I was just glad she got the size right. And she’s seen a couple of them, huh.”
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He may have felt frustrated with the talk surrounding his manhood at the time, but the Mad Men alumnus is now embracing it. “It was a topic of fascination for other people, certainly not me,” Hamm explained to GQ Australia, adding, “By the way, as rumors go, not the worst.”
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The fan-favorite HQ Trivia host didn’t shy away from supplying his Twitter followers with a random tidbit of very personal information: “FUN FACT: My penis is of below-average length and girth,” he tweeted in December 2015. He expanded on that information in an interview with The Strategist in January 2018. “I’m not, uh, exactly blessed in the crotch department, and when I first became sexually active and started using condoms, I found the standard issue to be a little … baggy,” Rogowsky (over)shared with readers.
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In case you were wondering: The actor is, umm, not exactly gifted — a claim he candidly spoke about during an appearance on Jimmy Kimmel Live. “For a person who’s not extremely well-endowed, who’s kinda insecure about my own junk, there’s something about sitting naked with a Sami native in a hut getting warm right away before you say ‘hello,’” he told Kimmel while recounting his trip to Finland, where he spent time alone in a cabin. “That kinda thing is a very uncomfortable thing, but in Finland it’s so culturally normal. Here it’s not normal. Guys sit with their boxers on.”
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The How I Met Your Mother actor has a fan in Mila Kunis, his Forgetting Sarah Marshall co-star, who saw the actor naked in one of their scenes together. “I want it on the record, okay? It’s a nice d—. Well proportioned,” the actress told GQ in 2010. “Handsome. I have nothing but good things to say about Jason Segel’s penis.”
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