My mother is horrible about our dead dad and she won’t let us mourn him – The Sun

DEAR DEIDRE: I KNEW my parents were unhappy together – but Mum is so nasty about my dead father and it is distressing.

Dad died suddenly last year from a massive stroke, aged 52. He was a wonderful father and my sister and I miss him terribly.


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I am a 27-year-old man, my sister is 25. My mother is 50 and bad-mouths him constantly. If she hears us remembering him fondly, she complains about all she gave up for him.

She now claims he cheated repeatedly. We cannot know the truth as he is not here to defend himself.

My sister and I have repeatedly asked her not to tell us their marital problems but she carries on.

Surely she should not speak negatively to us about our dead father?

DEIDRE SAYS: It sounds as though his death left her with unfinished business but you, their children, are not the people she should offload on to.

Tell your mum you are sorry she feels so bitter and she clearly needs support, but you and your sister are not the ones to provide it. If she starts, leave the room.

Urge her to contact Cruse bereavement care (0808 808 1677, cruse.org.uk).

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