Woman snaps and makes aunt cry at granddads funeral but internet sides with her
A woman described an incident where she got into a big argument with her aunt at her granddad's funeral, and the internet seemed to side with her on it.
The woman shared her story on the popular subreddit r/ AITA, which stands for (Am I the A**hole). Users share their experiences on this subreddit asking for advice and seeking to know whether they made the right decision in that scenario.
In this story, the woman's grandfather died shortly after her 21st birthday. She described how her dad left when she was seven years old and her mum passed away four years after that.
The woman was raised by her grandfather after her mum died, despite his age, and the fact that he too was mourning the death of his daughter at the same time.
Reddit user train_to_yuma talks about how her grandad’s physical condition deteriorated in his last few years, and although she expressed worry, he assured her he’d “see her through ‘til 21.” She describes him as the “light of her life.”
The user said: “When he died, I didn't shed a tear. It's hard for me to explain why, but he was still giving sass on his deathbed, and pinched my arm and told me to not cry because he wasn't crying.
"After I left, I received a text from my aunt later that evening that she was disappointed at me for not being visibly mournful and apparently him telling me not to was a very poor response. I ignored this, since we were all grieving.”
But that isn't all of it. There was more drama. After the woman returned home, she found that the shelves were empty and bits of furniture were missing and photos had been taken from the walls. She confronted her aunt, who returned most of what was taken after a big argument.
“Maybe she didn’t think I’d notice, but not only had she taken both my granddad’s and his dad’s service medals, she had sold them as well. Luckily, I found the selling post on Facebook quickly enough and the man who bought them was happy to return them to me.”
Despite her anger, she didn’t confront her aunt about this, she described herself as an ‘extremely mellow person’ but the drama continued into the gathering afterward.
The woman added: “She told others how selfish I was for not letting her take any of his belongings, and how she thought I pushed him into signing his house over to me"
Then it all erupted.
“I was soon invited to sit among a table of some of his old friends, at which my aunt was sat too. I tried to not pay her any mind, but the conversation soon devolved and she slipped up and told the table that I hadn't even let her take a single medal," she wrote.
"I lost myself at this and erupted into a slurry of profanities. My aunt immediately starts crying, and I seize the moment to call her out on her selling the medals in the first place.
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"I'm not sorry for the things I said to my aunt, but I'm deeply ashamed of my behaviour given the setting. Some people have approached me offering support, to which I have not replied, but I have this immense feeling of guilt in my stomach that I can't shake.”
The woman now wonders, was she the a** hole?
“I know for sure that I overreacted, but AITA? Should I apologise to each attendee individually? I'm in a terrible way at the moment and my mind is all over the place. I feel like I need someone from the outside to tell me what to do.”
The results are in. Here are the abbreviations if you get lost:
You're the a** hole (& the other party is not) = YTA
You're Not the a** hole (& the other party is) = NTA
Everyone sucks here = ESH
No a** holes here = NAH
Not enough info = INFO
It would seem the internet has ruled her as ‘NTA’ not the a** hole – hooray. One user commented strongly: “NTA. She clearly did not respect you or your grandfathers wishes. Though I suggest apologizing to the attendees, this was personal family drama that should have been said elsewhere.”
Another said: “NTA. I think you had just reached the end of your rope and snapped. I don’t blame you. Grief and stress can do a number on anybody and her prior behaviour was unbelievable and beyond. (I really can’t even wrap my head around it tbh.) I personally think she likely started crying because she was embarrassed at being found out and publicly called out for it.”
In response to the massive internet support, user train_to_yuma said: “Thank you so much everyone. This has been a huge help for me. I've spent some time writing a few thank you cards out to the guests, and will post them in the morning. Once everything is closed off regarding his will, I intend to never speak to my aunt again.”
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